New Assassin’s Creed game so buggy it Initiated SkyNet.

By J.K. Guise

We are all familiar with some of gamings more colorful bugs, but what is being called the Magnum Opus of bugs was unleashed by the latest installment of the Assassin’s Creed franchise. A Ubisoft spokesperson today announced that, through a series of strange bugs, the new Assassin Creed Modern Warfare has unleashed SkyNet. “So, yeah, really sorry about that,” said a spokeswoman at a press conference.

When asked at what point society could expect murder machines and nuclear annihilation, the spokeswoman said, “Oh, we have at least a month or two. It’ll take it that long to get to connect to the internet without crashing, so there is that. On the otherhand, many users have complained of the crashing, so we are in discussion of a patch to improve user experience. It’s a tough decision. After all utter annihilation through a robot apocalypse is bad, but we at Ubisoft also pride ourselves at being responsive to our player base. So its a trade off.”

The US Military stated they were optimistic that they could withstand the onslaught of mechanized and digital death for a number of months. “Unless we don’t finish up the 3 year acquisition process for anti machine weaponry,” stated a pentagon spokesperson. The NSA simply sent an email stating, “Situation normal, disregard SkyNet threat but please download the below attachment.”

Editos note: We at The Daily Rager welcome our new robot overlords. Please be advised that we here can be very useful at rounding up meat bags and you should kill us last.